“I’m dying.” Is it True?

Recently a woman I know who is living with cancer told another woman she just met that she is dying. She has been living with cancer for 3+ years now and has many more days/months ahead of living her life.  I hadn’t questioned the belief of dying until I was at the 9 day Byron Katie School of The Work.  During one large group session a man stood up to tell Katie his story before doing The Work with her.  As a part of his introductory story, he said “My dad is dying.”  Katie interrupted him and asked, “Is it true? Is your dad dying?” He replied “Yes!” and then shared his father’s medical condition.  Katie responded, “We are either alive or we are not. In my experience people are living until they are not.” Katie then asked the man, “Is your dad dying?” After thoughtful contemplation he replied “No” and then continued with his story.

This was such a brief exchange but I found it profound. It inspired me to question my own idea of “dying” to discover that I agree with Katie. When I look at someone who tells me they are dying, I see a person who is alive and still full of life force. We are alive until we are not! About a year ago a good friend with terminal cancer said to me, “I need to get everything in order because I’m dying.” My response was, “You look very much alive to me!” And is it true, do we need to get everything in order? Is it possible to get all things in order?

What other beliefs do we carry that could be questioned? “She’s lazy.” “He should get a job.”  “I don’t have enough money.” What beliefs would you be willing to look at today?

It Shouldn’t Snow in May!

  Yesterday I was listening to a CD by Martha Beck, Life Coach, reminding us to Question our Thoughts. Are they honestly true?  Byron Katie, Loving What Is,  also comes to mind. I can hear her ask the question “Is it true?”

Snow is falling. It’s May in Wisconsin. I do not recall ever seeing it snow here in May. “It shouldn’t be snowing! It’s May! My daffodils and tulips will freeze!”  Is it true? No. The truth is that it is snowing and therefore it should be. Two days ago it was 81 degrees. As I worked in my yard for a couple of hours on that warm day, I was feeling a little tension while noticing how much (I thought) needed to be done in my gardens, in addition to raking the lawn, cleaning up puppy poop and reseeding bare areas. Today my entire yard and gardens are covered with snow. All looks clean and still. There is nothing to be done but watch the gorgeous snow fall.