Whose Business Are You In?

What a relief!  This message brings to mind Byron Katie’s thoughts on Whose Business Are You In?  Here is what she has to say. (It’s definitely worth reading!)

Whose Business Are You In? (Byron Katie)

Notice when you hurt that you are mentally out of your business.

If you’re not sure, stop and ask, “Mentally, whose business am I in?”

There are only three kinds of business in the universe: mine, yours, and God’s.

Whose business is it if an earthquake happens? God’s business.

Whose business is it if your neighbor down the street has an ugly lawn? Your neighbor’s business.

Whose business is it if you are angry at your neighbor down the street because he has an ugly lawn? Your business.

Life is simple—it is internal.

Count, in five minute intervals, how many times you are in someone else’s business mentally. Notice when you give uninvited advice or offer your opinion about something (aloud or silently).

Ask yourself: “Am I in their business? Did they ask me for my advice?” And more importantly, “Can I take the advice I am offering and apply it to my life?”

When I am tempted to give unsolicited advice or when I am worried about what is happening in another person’s life, I ask myself, “Whose business am I in?” Most often it isn’t mine! I feel torn between the desire to share my wisdom (Ha!) to be of help while also acknowledging that it’s not my life or my business. If I am asked for advice, I may give it but I have found that giving advice that hasn’t been requested is typically met with resistance. I also discovered that when I give advice or share self-help materials without being asked, the message is, “You need fixing. I can help.”  This stems from my belief (that I haven’t shaken completely) that I Need Fixing, so I project that belief onto others. It damages relationships and sets us apart.  Stay in my own business. Heal my own life.  Respect others enough to do their own work.  Anna Martinson, Life Coach.

“When you think that someone or something other than yourself needs to change, you’re mentally out of your business.” Byron Katie

 

Comments

  1. Respect others enough to do their own work! Love it:) Been getting a lot of ‘heat’ from friends who project their own evolution onto me as though it were my business. Somethings are just not within my power to change AND it starts with someone else’s business.

    Thanks Anna!

  2. This is such valuable insight. I just watched a short video (which I tagged in an upcoming blog post I just wrote) with her and it was just what I needed today, along with this post. I can feel things shifting internally already and it feels really good!

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